What You Need to Know About Role Play

Role play is a great way to explore your deepest desires and try out new sexual acts and roles with your partner. Some people take to role play like they were born to it, easily pretending to be someone else for the fun of it. Others feel awkward AF and convince themselves they can’t do it.

If you’re willing to experiment a little and try it out, role play lets you play, fantasize, and explore sex and kink in your relationship in a fun way.

Explore Your Fantasies in a Safe Way

It’s more normal than you realize to go through life imagining all kinds of scenarios in your head. If they’re sexy and kinky, that’s pretty normal, too. People with active imaginations experience this kind of thing all the time. But just because you fantasize about something – like a gang bang scene at a party – doesn’t mean it’s always a good idea to do.

When you’re in a relationship with someone you trust, role play is a safe way to explore. Instead of wandering into a strange place to try something with a stranger, you’re doing it with someone you know and care about. You should be able to share your desires and try new things without fear. If something doesn’t work, you only need to say so. Your partner might have a fantasy or two they’d like to explore, too.

Try Out New Roles and Kinks

Having a fantasy about being submissive to your partner is easier to have than it is to admit. Maybe you’ve read or watched 50 Shades or you’ve found kinky porn. You like what you see, but you’re not sure how to talk to your partner about it.

Role play is a way to “play” with something to figure out if you really like it. For a brief moment in time, you pretend to be someone else. That person isn’t “you” so you’re safe to try all kinds of kinky things. If, when you’re done, you find you really enjoyed it, it’s time to ‘fess up to your partner. You never know, they might like it too.

Costumes Can Help

For a sexy role play scene, costumes aren’t required, but they can help. Some people want clothes and costumes so the moment feels more real. Other people need a sexy role play costume to get into character. You might not even know what role play scene you want to try until you see the outfit. There are so many costumes and fantasies to explore:

  • Inmate
  • Naughty school girl
  • Cowboy/cowgirl
  • French maid
  • Harem girl
  • Nurse
  • Bunny
  • Police
  • Firefighter
  • Belly dancer
  • Superheroes

Make It Detailed or Don’t

For some people, they need to know exactly what they’re going to say and what they’ll wear to do role play. Others just need an idea and someone to get them started. There’s no right or wrong way to try a role play scenario. It’s about whatever makes you hot and excited. If your partner needs more or less details than you do, help them in whatever way you can. Remember, this is supposed to be good for both of you.

Mentally map out a script if you like but remember to go with the flow based on what your partner says and does. Wear a sexy costume to get into the role but don’t worry if it’s not “perfect.” If you need to come up with fake names and backstories, that’s fine. You might need that in the beginning until you get comfortable with your role play fun. Sometimes, it’s as simple as pretending to meet each other for the first time in a bar. Other times, it’s a full epic story like you might see in a movie.

The Silly Feeling Goes Away

A lot of people say they can’t do role play because they’ll feel silly. You might at first. It’s strange to pretend to be someone different. Stranger still to act out a sexual fantasy if you’ve never done it before. But if you get into it, that silly and strange feeling goes away. When you’re both into the moment, you almost become your character. Which makes sense because they’re usually based on your own sexual desires, so you’re definitely still you even though you’re acting out a fantasy.


Not everyone wants to try role play, and that’s okay. It’s not for everyone, but don’t let fear hold you back from trying if you’re curious. This is your opportunity to bring a fantasy to life, explore something new and exciting, and have sex in a new way with your partner. Trying on these roles and exploring your fantasies can lead to amazing new places. It might be something you do once and forget. But it also might lead to more self-discovery and lots of sexual pleasure.

Is role play something you want to try? Let us know in the comments!

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