There are a number of reasons that long-distance relationships can be difficult on couples: the lack of shared time, space, and experience can result in feelings of loneliness and depression. Luckily, there are more ways than ever to keep connected with your partner from afar, from texting and FaceTime to sexting and, you guessed it, adult sex toys!
In recent years, sex toy manufacturers have kept pace with the ever-advancing tech industry, launching a variety of app-controlled, Bluetooth-enabled toys, and remote controlled vibrators that not only provide more intense, fine-tuned pleasure than some of their analog counterparts, but can do it from a distance. And while there are a number of toys that operate via remote control, the ones we’ll be looking at here require a smartphone (regular remote-controlled sex toys have a much shorter range, and can generally only be controlled from within the same room or building).
The best sex toys for long-distance couples come in a variety of shapes, sizes, and uses, from classic rabbit vibrators and bullet vibes to high-design wearables, prostate massagers, and clitoral suction stimulators. Basically, whatever your (or your partner’s!) taste, there’s a toy that will bring them right into your bedroom, even if they’re a world away.
How would a typical “long-distance sex” session go?
Before we take a look at the types of long-distance sex toys that are out there, let’s consider long-distance sex in general. If you and your partner are sexually monogamous, spending lots of time apart could result in some pent-up sexual frustration that self-pleasure may not satisfy.
How a long-distance sex session goes, then, is up to you and your partner! Discuss what types of things you both might want, and what you might be comfortable with. If you’re down with a lot of dirty talk, try good old-fashioned phone sex, which can be enjoyed with or without the addition of app-enabled sex toys. You may also want to start a bit more slowly, with some steamy sexting, which could include swapping sexy photos or videos. And, speaking of videos, there are a number of video-chatting apps, from Skype to FaceTime, that can add heat to a remote sex sesh. An easy way to start, in all of these instances, is to go with a classic: tell your partner what you’re wearing, how you’re touching yourself, or how you’d like to be touching them, and let the conversation flow from there.
In many instances, long-distance sex may culminate when one or both participants achieves orgasm, at which time… well, do what you’d do if you were together! Unfortunately, cuddling is not an option, but continuing the conversation after the session has concluded will help you both feel close to one another, and will heighten a sense of intimacy. A little aftercare goes a long way! And, who knows: you may just set the stage for round 2.
Apps for long-distance sexual play
If you’re interested in introducing sex toys into your long-distance dynamic, there’s one important tool you need to own (aside from the toy itself, of course): a smartphone, with an internet or data connection. Long-distance sex toys are controlled via smartphone apps, either used by the person who’s holding the toy (meaning you can use these toys on your own, if your partner is not available), or by someone who’s very far away. Some of these toys can also be controlled on a computer or laptop, but they’re designed with apps in mind!
These apps are 100% secure, so there’s no need to worry about your data being accessed by anyone you don’t want.
Chances are, if you have a type of vibrator you love — whether it’s a rabbit, an egg, or a simple bullet — there’s an app-controlled version of it! The Satisfyer Mono Flex Vibe, for instance, is a classic rabbit whose Satisfyer Connect app gives the user access to millions of modes and vibration patterns, and even music pairing selections. The Mono Flex has a built-in on/off button, as well as a button to control intensities, in case you want to take a break or adjust things on your own.
The Ella Neo App Control Bullet Vibe In Red may be small, but what it lacks in size, it makes up in power (and colour — it’s a vibrant, punchy, very sexy fire-engine red). The Feel Technology Enabled app allows you or your partner to control the Ella Neo using touch, or even voice — perfect for phone-sex sessions. It has an insertable length of 3.25 inches, but is great for any erogenous zone on your body.
For a two-in-one treat, Satisfyer Sexy Secret Panty Vibe can be held in your hand, or worn in a pair of (included) blue panties, which have a special pocket to hold the toy. It’s controlled via the OhMiBod Remote App, and, when worn, offers limitless potential for truly hands-free stimulation. Which brings us to…
Vibrating toys that can be inserted, and then controlled remotely, are the most-popular type of long-distance toy for a reason: since they require no hands-on manipulation by you, they do a great job at simulating the experience of being touched by a partner! The https://www.pinkcherry.com/products/pinkcherry-pulse-a-nator-pleasure-panty-vibe is a favourite for a reason: it’s designed to mold to your body’s curves, hugging your G-spot and your clitoris simultaneously — and, if and when your partner are together IRL, its design makes it great for wearing during partnered sex! The We-Connect app has its own in-built chat and camera function, so you and your partner can share sexts and images as you play.
For anal play, Vick has you covered with the We-Vibe Vector + Prostate Massager. Once in place, this toy targets the oh-so-sensitive prostate, while massaging the external perineum for a one-two punch of pleasure. With the Svakom Feel Technology Enabled app, your partner will be able to control the toy’s intensity and rhythms, and can connect with you via webcam during your session.
We-Vibe’s Moxie Wearable Clitoral VIbrator is perfect for those who prefer a lot of external stimulation. This type of toy is often called a “panty vibe”, but you can wear it against whatever type of undergarment you prefer, thanks to a super-secure magnetic clip that holds it in place while the We-Connect app allows your partner to deliver intense, customizable waves of pleasure.
App-controlled clitoral suction toys
Clitoral suction stimulators are intense — many clitoris-owners say this type of toy delivers the most mind-blowing orgasms imaginable. And since these toys are already specifically designed to mimic the sensation of oral sex, they’re perfect for long-distance play. Revel Vera Air Pulse Stimulator In Purple is one such toy: using the Satisfyer Connect App, your partner can deliver pulse after pulse of stimulating air, and also features live video chat within the app.
Toys for long-distance, or IRL play
While app-enabled toys allow you and your partner to engage in super-sexy long-distance play, these toys are also perfect for in-person fun. They can be controlled from across the room or across the city, so whether your partner is watching you get turned on by how they’re using the toy’s app, or warming you up as they head to you for some in-person fun, there are plenty of reasons to introduce a high-tech toy into your sex life. Pick one up today from best-selling brands including LELO sex toys, We-Vibe, and more.