When it comes to consensual love between adults, our hearts guide us towards who we want and how we spend our time with them. Love is complicated because it’s so subjective, but that in and of itself is a beautiful thing. When you’re sexually (or asexually) attracted to somebody, it is up to you to decide who to pursue, and that’s perfectly okay. To put it bluntly, who we want to date is nobody else’s business (except anybody else involved) — even if it’s more than one person at a time.
While some people are thrilled to spend the rest of their lives with only one other person, other individuals thrive off of love from multiple partners and choose to be polyamorous. Although this concept is anything but new, it has progressively become more common in recent years. At PinkCherry, we support those who are considering or currently engaging in a polyamorous relationship, and we want to explore the ins and outs of it to ensure that you’re aware of your feelings and those of all involved. In this continuation of our series on different relationship types, we’ll dive into the specifics of what you can expect from being polyamorous and help guide you through this decision.
What Is a Polyamorous Relationship?
If you’re unfamiliar with the term, a polyamorous relationship (a form of consensual non-monogamy) is about romantically dating more than one person at a time. Each person involved in this type of relationship can have multiple relations with other polyamorous individuals, and those relationships are often open to all sexual orientations. Sometimes, these relationships can overlap into a single polyamorous relationship, while other times they are kept completely separate. It’s important to know that, unlike open relationships, polyamory is rooted in deep love and romantic emotion for every partner you date. Rather than being in a committed relationship to one person and deciding to simply have sex with other people, you are in multiple, committed relationships with mutual respect, consent and disclosure to all parties involved. Don’t get us wrong, though — there is sure to be plenty of great sex, too!
Polyamorous relationships are becoming more common, but there is still a great deal of confusion surrounding them, particularly from some individuals who strictly practice monogamy. To clear the air, we must address two large reasons why some people choose to be polyamorous: love and fun.
Polyamorous Relationships Offer Plenty of Love
One of the main goals of dating is to fall in love, and many people find that after building a significant bond with another individual over time. However, people who are polyamorous genuinely thrive off of love from more than one person. This doesn’t mean that they can’t ever have a monogamous relationship or eventually decide to limit their care to only one partner (in fact, some people start with monogamy and move onto polyamory, and they may even jump back and forth). It simply means that they tend to be happier loving a lot of people and don’t want to restrict or be dishonest with themselves. In a single polyamorous relationship shared between all parties, everyone involved may fall in love with each other and find contentment.
Polyamorous Relationships Are Thrilling
Sure, relationships of all kinds can offer excitement and fun, but polyamory takes things to another level due to the amount of different partners. When you’re polyamorous and in multiple relationships, dating and sex are amplified because you have options for who you choose to spend time with on a given day. More importantly, you get to learn many fascinating things about your partners and build lifelong memories (or friendships even if the relationship ends).
Three Tips to Make the Most Out of a Polyamorous Relationship
Whether you’re currently in a polyamorous relationship or would like to be in one, there are some important things to consider to avoid problems, such as heartbreak, crossing boundaries or finding yourself bickering with your partners over the silliest issues. We understand that one relationship may look different than another, but we believe these three tips are excellent guidelines to follow to keep everybody happy.
1. Make Sure Everybody is Onboard
Before you engage in a new polyamorous relationship or begin to seek multiple relationships, make sure you ask yourself if it’s truly what you want. If you have a current monogamous partner, do they want the same thing? Is there anybody in the relationship that feels iffy about it? These are extremely crucial questions to ask because the last thing you want is for you or any of your partners to feel uncomfortable. Remember — consent always matters, so don’t put anybody in a position that they don’t want to be in.
2. Set Rules to Abide By
Sure, rules can be a drag and may go against the whole “wild” aspect of dating multiple partners. But, boundaries need to be in place to avoid unnecessary, damaging issues. Make sure you and each of your partners go over what is or isn’t okay. This can include stuff in the bedroom, living arrangements or even scheduling. Don’t make the mistake of making plans with Joe when you already have a date with Sam!
3. Keep the Relationship Fun With Fantastic Dates
Just like any other relationship, you have to keep things moving in a positive, enjoyable direction. Whether you go out as a group, stay in or spend time with each other on a one-on-one basis, there’s plenty to do to make the most out of your time. Here are some of our favorite polyamorous date ideas:
- Going to the movie theater or watching movies together
- Playing multiplayer video games
- Having picnics in the park
- Making a list of each person’s ideal day-trip destination, and slowly knocking out each trip
Fulfill Your Polyamorous Needs at PinkCherry!
Polyamory may not be suitable for everybody, but for those that desire to find love (or fun) in many partners, the team at PinkCherry has all of the hot sex toys and products you need for more amazing and intimate intercourse. Whether you wish to roleplay with dress-up lingerie or throw a rowdy polyamorous party with novelty sex toys and games, we have you covered. Shop PinkCherry today, or contact us if you have any questions about our products!